You’re a faker and I’m a hypocrite

I’m a believer
So that I believe all your words
I’m telling you, before that, I doubted your words
But somehow you made me believe
Or I, made me believe
From deep inside I know, I already know
I just make myself more comfort to believe in your lies, faker
So that I became a hypocrite

When U love someone

When u love someone, everything make no sense.
When u love someone, he is the only thing that is right for you.
When u love someone, everything not him is wrong.
When u love someone, you can’t open your heart for anyone.
When u love someone, you know he is not the right one, but you already in love with him.
When u love someone, you try to find somebody else.
When u love someone, you can’t find somebody better than him.
When u love someone, but you know he is wrong, u force yourself to stop loving him.
When u love someone, u get hurt.
When u love someone, u hate yourself for being in love.

Beauty and the Beast

One of my favorite princess is Belle. Many people thinks she was having a stockholm syndrome (Stock·holm syn·drome: feelings of trust or affection felt in certain cases of kidnapping or hostage-taking by a victim toward a captor).

But no, they only see the whole story without understanding the plot in detail. What I see is:

Belle is a beauty and smart girl who love her father so much because he was the only parent she had. In her village, she was wanted to marry by Gaston the most powerful assh*le in town, but she ignored him because he was just a man with muscle but no brain, he also very narcisstic and thought he could get everything he want.

One day, Belle's father was lost in somewhere out of their village and accidentally arrived at beast's castle. He entered there, seeking for a help and a little courious about that mysterious castle in the middle of the forest. But Beast was so very insecure that he thought Belle's father was an intruder so he prisoned him.

Belle worried about his father because their horse was came home alone without him. She started seeking his father with the horse and arrived at Beast castle. Belle then sacrifice herself to became Beast's hostage to discharge her beloved father. Beast was dazzled with Belle's beauty and also thought she might could save him from the curse that made him into a beast, so he accepted that concurrence.

After released Belle's father, Beast gave Belle a proper grand bedroom for her to be comfort at his castle. At first, Belle didn't like and reject Beast because of his temper and rude act. She felt upset every night in her bedroom, but the servants who cursed into housware like Lumière, Cogsworth, mrs. Potts, and her son Chip, calming Belle and assured that the Beast is not a bad person, he was only lonely. Belle started to try understand Beast more. But one day Belle went to the west wing of the castle and get into the room which is forbidden for her to step in, there she found the rose that used to count down Beast cursed. Beast found her and get mad, showing his temper and animals side. Then she ran away from the castle. 

In the forest, she was intercepted by wolves, but before she was torn into pieces, Beast came and save her. At the castle, they talked about what was happened, Belle admonished about his bad temper, Beast was realized that it was his fault, but after that Belle thanked him for saved her life. After opened her heart and saved by him, she could feel goodness and sincere in Beast. Then day by day she can found common in them and sharing a good things. Belle started to feel comfort and unconsciously falling in love with him.

One day, Belle missed her father. Beast offered her a magic mirror that can see through what ever she wanted to see. She was shocked to see her father was laying on the bed and looks sick. Then she asked Beast to let her visit her father for a while. Beast pity her, let her go home and give her the mirror in case she want to see the castle.

When she back home, Gaston know and also found out that there's a Beast at the castle in the middle of the forest, he also can feel that Belle was fall in love with the Beast so he planed to attack Beast at his castle. Then Gaston locked up Belle and her father in their house and went to Beast castle with the villagers.

Chip (the cursed cup), that sneaked into Belle's bag, help Belle and her father to go out. Then they ran into the castle with their horse. When Belle get there, Beast saw her and got more strenght to defend himself from the villager. At one time Belle gets to Beast at the upper castle, Gaston stab him and he was hurted, but before totally sprawl, Beast could beat Gaston and make him fall from the high. Then Belle ran into Beast who was lied down unconsciously. She shed a tear while hugging Beast and admit that she love him right before the last rose petals falling down. And then the magic happened, Beast turned into a human shaped prince in front of Belle, so did the cursed castle's servants all turned back into human. And the gloomy castle turned into pretentious kingdom as the spell exuviated.

Well that was a very classic fairy-taled happy ending, which I like..

I wanna tell that I love Belle's character because she's so smart, she's pretty but doesn't show that off like most girls at the village, she doesn't really care about her appearance. She prefer to go to bookstore and being herself even when people say she was "odd" and "peculiar". And she could explicitely reject Gaston because they have different purpose in life.

She dare to dream, even that she lived in the common village with commonly idea of life, she had a dream to have an adventurous live and so courious about what outside her world.

She was also very brave, when she found out her beloved father was missing, she immediately went to find him into the dark forest. 

And she's so selfless that she sacrifice herself to save her father because she love him very much. She is type of girl whom will do anything for everyone she love.

She show her selflessness again and her warm-hearted too when she started to open her heart to understand Beast more, by not seeing his physical appearance and understand his bad attitude. 

She can understand him, that makes him melted and try to change his attitude because of her, not 'for' her. Maksudnya si Beast ini merubah sikapnya karena dia merasa dimengerti sama Belle, bukan berubah karena disuruh sama Belle nya. Jadi alasan untuk berubahnya lebih internal sehingga lebih tulus dan lebih last forever.

So it is proved that Belle loves Beast not only because he captive her at his castle. But because they learn to understand each other and be the reason for each other to be better. Isn't it so cuteeeeee?

Eyakkkk jadi baper gaes. Ya memang cerita ini so so fairy tale dan terasa tidak mungkin terjadi di dunia nyata karena terlalu naif (?) 

But I really believe and love this kind of story. I just a fairy tale lover forever and ever. Maybe it's because I can't feel that myself in this real life. YA SIAPA JUGA SIH YANG MAU NGERASAIN MASUK KE DALAM BANGUNAN ASING YANG ADA MAKHLUK BUAS DIDALEMNYA, GUE MAH KABUR GAES.

Moreover, even fairy tale has it's ups and downs. Like Belle, she had to sacrifice herself to save her father, not knowing what will happen to her in that gloomy castle with the Beast inside. She never had a will before to fall in love with the Beast, but it happened just like that without planed first.

So do in real life, there's so many things happened that we don't like and hard to accept but actually later we'll find out there is a deep meaning of what happened that can change our boring casual life forever.

--the end--

Unconditional Love

Can you call it love when there's term and condition?

You said "I could just love you if......" 

IF.......(?) 

seriously? Do you realize what did you just say?

Lo mending ke laut pacaran sama ikan kalo 'sayang' nya pake 'kalo'.

Well, we're all grown ups and we do 'love' with logic now. So I can't blame you if you made some 'if' word to your partner.

And that's why I don't like being adult. There's so much logic, reason, consideration, demand needed. I'm myself, forget how to think like I used to, but I remember life was so much simpler one-time ago, when I was younger.

Padahal, kita bisa aja biarin semuanya mengalir, apa yang terjadi, ya terjadilah, tanpa ada banyak tuntutan semua harus sesuai logika kita yang terbatas. 

Maksudnya bukan berarti pasrah juga dari awal ya, tapi kalau udah dikasi, ya terima aja, gausah banyak protes dan koreksi. Meskipun kamu bilang kamu 'mengkritik' dengan alasan biar lebih baik, tapi kalau menurutku sih kamu gaakan bisa ngerubah orang dengan kritikan-kritikan kasarmu itu. Tetap aja, namanya kritik pasti bikin sakit hati you know? FYI, it change nothing. Dan itu berlaku juga buat perilaku kamu yang nunjukkin ga suka sama sifat pasanganmu. It breaking their heart, you don't know how much effort they did to make you happy. But you break their heart that easily.

Mungkin kata-kata bisa merubah orang untuk sementara, tapi perbuatan bisa merubah orang untuk selamanya. 

Daripada kamu bilang "coba kamu lebih hati-hati/teliti/cerdas/mikir/*dan tuntutan-tuntutan lainnya*". 

Tunjukin aja kalau kamu ikhlas, kamu suka, kamu senang, tanpa ada SYARAT (<- ugh I hateeeee that word and its meaning).

Dumb? You think its dumb, and stupid? So we have different perspective, because I called its Love.

If you think that kind of love is stupid and make no sense, it means you're selfish af *as fuck* egois banget.

Why are you so selfish? You blame other people because they can't treat you well. If you love them you won't yelling at them, telling that they're wrong. NO. you won't tell them wrong. You can't change them, change yourself to be more respect to other people!

Kalo emang ga suka sama sifatnya, dari awal ga usah sok manis. You stupid pemberi harapan palsu. You should love person with all their curves and all their edges, all their perfect imperfections (well said Mr. John Legend!) and if you don't love them like that, you really should go from their life and love(fck) yourself. (well said Justin, you refine word fuck to love, great)

Where can I found unconditional love apart from Allah the Most Gracious, Most Merciful...?